منذ عدة ايام استوقفنى سؤال...

منذ عدة ايام استوقفنى سؤال....

كعادتى ,لدى الكثير من الاسئلة ولكن لهذا السؤال وقع مختلف
اود ان اوجه هذا السؤال لكل الرجال الذيين ولدوا بين 1930 و 1960
بجميع اللغات...لكل من كان له يد فى صياغة التاريخ
مسلم او مسيحى او يهودى او حتى ملحد
عربى او اجنبى ابيض او اسمر ...
اين نذهب من هنا ؟ اين يمكننا ان نتجه؟
انا اعتبر من الجيل الثانى من المهاجرين من مصر...(.نحن الان بصدد نمو الجيل الثالث خارج الاراضى المصري)ة
سؤالى ....اين نذهب, اذا اتخذت الدين قالوا انك رجعى و الان استطاع الاعلام ان يسميهم بالارهابيين
ان اقبلت على الدنيا قاوا انك بوهيمى,ام انك انسان مادى.....
ايها الاباء,يا رجال الماضى يا قادة الدول.....يا من كانوا يتربون على ايادى العظماء.....
الستم انتم الجيل الذى اعلن ان الهجرة هى الحل؟
انتم من حارب وقرر ان الاستقلال التام او الموت الزوئام.....
وانتم من شاهد المسلمون يذبحون فى البوسنة
اليس من جيلكم صدام...الذى قتل و شرد و اشرف على الدمار
اليس من جيلكم من اعلن الحرب على الارهاب و اعتدى على العراق
اليس من جيلكم من قرر ان يغتال السادات بعد ان عبر و انتصر
الستم تنتم من قرر ان يطيح بالملكية المصرية املا فى العدل الاجتماعى....و ماذا كنت النتيجة الان
الستم انتم من قلتم ان عدوية هو انحطاط للاغنية المصرية....ما رأيكم فى شعبان و ابو الليف
الستم انتم من قال ان الشرطة فى خدمة الشعب....ما رايكم فى فيديو هتك عرض مواطن بالعصا
الستم انت من كتب اشعار يتغزل فى النيل....ما رأيكم فى ازمة النيل حاليا....
الم تعلمونا ان الدين طلب الا يغالى الاباء فى المهور.....ما رايكم فى طلبات الزواج التى تطلبوها انتم من الراغبين فى الزواج من بناتكم بعد ان كنتم تدفعون 7 جنيهات ايجار شهرى للشقة
انتم من سعر الماء و الدواء اغلى من البانجو و الحشيش !!!!!!
قد لا يسعفنى الوقت فى سرد مصائبكم.....و سرقاتكم و جرائمكم ...
ولكن يمكننى ان اقول انى اخترت.....اخترت ان اعلم ابنائى انه لا وجود لشىء اسمه "الماضى" او التاريخ"
لأنكم و بمنتهى البساطة ,اخطأتم...لقد كذبتم على و عاى ابناء جيلى....
و الان جاء دورى ان اقرر و ان اختار ما اكتب.....
لن اسمع أى نصيحة,و سأشكك فى كل معلوماتكم.....لانى انا من ادفع الثمن حاليا...انا من اعيش مع امراض و فيروسات خبيثة من اختراعكم....انا من يعيش مع اطفال ايتام بسبب حروبكم.....و غيرهم مرضى نفسين
انا من عليه ان يقلق على مستقبل الماء و الجفاف فى الارض....انا من عليه ان يعالج الكراهية التى زرعتوها فى عقولنا تجاه الغريب لانه يختلف عنى فى اللون او الدين

انا الان من سيقود......يقرر....يجرب....يكتب....
و بدونكم...

some words for my LOVE

BABY,
Today while I was ,as usual, in my own world. It hit my mind a very important fact.
We have been together almost 2 years, if a person would like to summarize such a story like ours…I would prefer NOT to summarize….reason why ?
All the small details in all its moments and seconds are so valuable…
From the smile of the first kiss
To the tears of first time we fight…
The hours we spend in bed day dreaming….the countless times we hug each other seeking refuge from the curl world…the engorgement words
Holding hands while our fears push the tears to fall and show ing our weakness to the entire world,,,, but we r there for each other,
We back each other, we can’t stop kissing each other “and I’ll get to know how u like to be kissed “

again

And it’s time again
It’s this time of life where i just feel board of the disturbing questions I have on my mind…to many questions, and its never been answered\and guess what ,I lost hope of it being answered.
I just want to know how can I stop caring any more ..
I don’t want to care about my life when am 40 ,I wana worry about NOW

I don’t want to keep on imagining my KID, boy or a girl,
How and when ,and above all what am I gona teach to this new visitor on planet earth. I am worried about my parents, they are 2 steps close from being “past tense” have the accomplished everything they aimed for ?
Are they proud of me ? am i proud of myself ?
If no, why
If yes. then what for.
When am I going to stick to one path..stand up for all that I believe in
Am I an artist ?
Am I a rich politician
Am I a writer
Am I a normal happy father and a family man
Which way ,no one knowz ,it’s all a matter of future
This world we live in is amazing
Only when you come so close to the END of your time
You realize that NOTHING from the past things that made you go sad or angry or hurt MATTERS !!!! its all going to pass
Why worry ,,,,,

Lost in the FOG

Is it me or is it the dam weather or the fucken supplements I use for the Gym
Everyone talks to me on the phone; see that I am sounding down…
I answer,,(I am ok ) its all ok
But hues what
I feel like I am not capable of taking it
I am waiting time, going up and down
Back and forth, happy with a deep soar cut inside me…
I am almost 30…I never thought I will be saying that “I am 30” but guess what
Am getting old hehehe but only in numbers, I still feel the same ….
And this is defiantly not a good sign!!!!! u r supposed to change (and am talking dramatically )
My changes are not considered drastic.
Or maybe they are …and am just squeezing my own balls
This might be a serious issue
I saw people around me moving, changing countries changing careers and jobs
CHAAAAAANGE and am fuckin stuck in this shit hole.
Am tired of dealing with liars, people who don’t respect or honor what they say
Am not capable of constructing a significant opinion about ME or my own goals or mission
Am LOST
Lost in the fog
And the anger is getting bigger and bigger
Its consuming my energy
Consuming my thinking
I just wana kick someone in the guts
And I want to scream

This is not even a word ,it’s some invention that you use when you want to say a word that means “Nothing “ .
And shrabelz is the perfect deception for the current situation at my work
It’s so ridicules that you can’t stop laughing. And when asked why ?
The only proper answer is SHRABELZ. On the other hand I have to also say that I am in a very happy mood, despite all the finical crisis that am facing…I can only say SHRABELZ and laugh a way the problem. It’s a new approach for solving problems .To laugh and say sharabelz

Kick back relax and enjoy the ride

Lately I have been taking this approach
To do the best I could, and then let the results come alone. Do you believe that what you do in life is somehow a reflection of your inner thoughts and subconscious?
Well, wither it was right or wrong, am not n the mood of judging.
I just want to SEE THINGS from my own perspective
Just like in the driver’s seat …
Or wait!!!! We keep on driving and going up and down with our dreams, thoughts, wishes, words, decisions, actions, and also our cars, ourselves and our love stories as well.
Do you know where are you heading?
Do you have a clear picture of your last STOP?
Don’t fool yourself …you don’t, and I don’t too
Simply if I do then I’ll just say “why bother go through all the hassle and tears. I know already how it is gona end.
Now I became a strong believer of this simple fact
Sometimes it’s better IF YOU DON’T KNOW.

To the entire world
Thank you for every thing
Good or bad
It’s always with hard situations we get to learn valuable lessons.
And man I got a lot of those, and also looks like I still have some more to be learned.
The mission am looking for is something that will appear when am ready
And maybe I will be ready when am 50 or 40 or even 60
Presidency  that sounds nice yet am sure it’s not gona be all FUN ride
It will have its own cost …lets see how is that gona go
Main while…lets Kick back relax and enjoy the ride
Baby …r u ready to back me up?


I

am always asking

Yesterday …
I saw,,, actually I will use the word “witnessed “ the beginning of a love relationship
A couple who are at the very beginning of their professional life. and they met by coincidence
What am interested in,is what’s hidden between the lines ,what’s hidden behind the fast eyes looks, what actually their hearts are trying to say yet the brain controls the emotions
I can see a lot of flirting …(ohh I miss that)
I can see a lot of promises..(hehe I love that ,but I realized I ruined it somehow)
I can see some shyness…I never connect to that
But am sure there is also a lot questions
And the most amazing part is …the lover’s jealousy…

Witnessing that made feel like I want to look my own story
Go through the pages and see !!! hummm
It needs a lot of editing, some parts that I just simply don’t like
And parts …are amazing …and some are shocking
And others….are standing with the question mark on top of it….
Wasn’t the materialistic demands and drama that made all the past stories …(called as past stories )
What’s new now ?
Or is it the same ?
Do u think that things are always gona be the same
What if NOT…